It's not bad for a first effort. You should try Rory's drafting system next time. People here are getting great results from it. Your draft does seem like it needs improvement. There's something weird happening around the side seam & back... Do you have wide hips? It looks like there's some tension there.
Sleeves could be improved. I'd say they need to be wider, and the back seam needs to be shortened to get rid of some of that bunching.
Looking again, I'm thinking maybe you have prominent buttocks. That might need to be compensated for next time by adding some extra flare to the side seam at the side panel.
It's not bad for a first effort. You should try Rory's drafting system next time. People here are getting great results from it. Your draft does seem like it needs improvement. There's something weird happening around the side seam & back... Do you have wide hips? It looks like there's some tension there.
Sleeves could be improved. I'd say they need to be wider, and the back seam needs to be shortened to get rid of some of that bunching.
Looking again, I'm thinking maybe you have prominent buttocks. That might need to be compensated for next time by adding some extra flare to the side seam at the side panel.
It's a good start - hang in there!